i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Randomize
