I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize