I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize
