You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
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