Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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