and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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