I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
