But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
