Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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