please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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