my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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