I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
