I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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