Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
