Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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