Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize