I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Randomize
