How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
