every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Randomize
