PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
