Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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