I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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