Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Randomize
