after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I don't think brook has ever known best
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
people are starting to question the shark bite story
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Randomize