You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
