We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
