Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Randomize
