Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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