Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize
