Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
She announced her abortion via fbk
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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