idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
