so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Randomize
