Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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