ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
