it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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