Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
