i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
i will never coherently bang her
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
