I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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