yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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