only if we run a train.
done.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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