Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
