so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
