let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
