If that was your dad, he is hot
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
