my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
