my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
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