awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
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