i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
