so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
i love accidental penises.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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