People with herpes should wear stickers.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
she told me i tasted like america
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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